They are also afraid of a mayor who truly represents the people.

The New York Times is losing their shit, as a Muslim mayor will be elected in NYC.

Gone are the days when they could use their flashy scam ticker, falsely claiming Hillary Clinton was guaranteed to win, discouraging voting nationwide. Now, under Lardass, the Times is beginning to realize that maybe, just maybe, voting actually matters.

With this seismic shift in the political landscape, the editorial board is, predictably, “concerned.”

Brainstorming has become frantic. Suggested headlines include “America’s New Mayor: A Muslim or Just a Political Unicorn?” and “What Does This Mean for Our Neighbors, the Uninformed Long Islanders Living in a Bubble?”

In a last-ditch effort to maintain relevance, the Times is rumored to be developing what insiders are calling the “Koala Test.” Inspired by the koala’s depressingly low reproduction rate, the idea is to see how many votes can be ignored before a crisis emerges. “If a Muslim mayor can be elected, what’s next? Are we expecting koalas to start holding office?” asked a slightly panicked senior editor, who might also have been looking for a drink at that point.

Will the New York Times will finally embrace reality or continue its spiraling descent/ Could this be the moment when they present facts for once, or will they simply hyperbolize every move made by their new mayor in a desperate attempt to retain their credibility?