Tylenol Is Terrible, But Lardass Is Much Worse for Public Health

Researchers have concluded that Lardass, known for ICE deportations, rising prices, and job losses, is responsible for a staggering 99.9% of all headaches reported in the past year. While the pharmaceutical giant Tylenol has been under scrutiny for its potential dangers, particularly for children, it seems the real headache epidemic stems from the antics of one man: Lardass.

Family members of Lardass have reported that their lives have been turned upside down, with some even facing deportation by ICE.

While Lardass is the primary cause of the headache crisis, Tylenol has not escaped the spotlight. Recent statistics reveal that over 50,000 cases of liver failure are linked to acetaminophen overdoses each year, with children being particularly vulnerable. However, way more children have already died since Lardass has not stopped the wars he promised to stop on day one.

Many families are struggling to make ends meet, and the last thing they need is a headache caused by Lardass’s inflation and job numbers. According to the USDA (this is real), from July 2025 to August 2025, retail beef and veal prices increased for the eighth month in a row. Beef and veal prices increased by 2.7 percent from July 2025 to August 2025 and were 13.9 percent higher in August 2025 than in August 2024.

Lardass’s job numbers are on par with his first term, where he had a net loss of 2.1 million jobs compared to Biden’s gain of 16.1 million jobs. It has been a summer of losing in 2025:

– June: -13,000 jobs (net loss)

– July: 79,000 jobs added (revised up)

– August: 22,000 jobs added

The historical net average is a gain of 124,000 jobs per month from 2010 to 2020.

As we navigate this headache epidemic, it’s clear that Lardass is the true villain. While Tylenol may pose risks, it pales in comparison to the chaos that Lardass brings into our lives. Families are left to choose between the dangers of medication and the headache-inducing antics of a man who seems to thrive on chaos. Tylenol sucks because it treats symptoms and not root causes. Lardass is a root cause, a virus eating away at American life as we know it, and Big Pharma has no cure.